Actual conversation between Hubby and I after we climbed in bed last night:
Me: I am thinking of taking the girls to the carnival tomorrow night.
Hubby: That will be fun.
Me: Yeah. Except it doesn't start until 6 o'clock. WHAT THE HECK. Why so late?
Hubby: I know, right? They should have a senior citizen/young children hour before they open to the public.
Me: But seriously. Why does every carnival in the history of mankind start at 6pm? Don't they know kids have bedtimes?
Hubby: Well. Let's be honest. Carnivals aren't exactly "kid friendly," nor are they geared toward kids.
Me: Whatevs. Kids love carnivals. But I know what you mean. Carnies are total creepers.
Hubby: "Carnival" is derived from the same latin word as "Carnivore." So they kind of mean the same thing.
Me: Because carnivores and carnivals both eat meat?
Hubby: No. Carnivore means "feast of the flesh." So carnivore is literally "feasting on flesh," and carnival is more of a culturally figurative "feast of the flesh."
Me: Can I ask you a question?
Me: Have you ever had, like, toenail fungus?
Hubby: I thought you were going to ask something about latin derivatives.
Me: Sorry to disappoint you.
Hubby: No. No I have not.
Me: Because my littlest pinky toenail has always had some weirdness happening in the corner, and I just noticed that the weirdness is taking over more of the nail. That's all.
Hubby: Um. You should probably get that checked out.
Me: Oh it's ok. It doesn't hurt or anything.
Hubby: Yeah. That's what they all say. And then things get crazy.
Me: I guess we'll see.
Hubby: Just call your doctor.
Me: I haven't seen my podiatrist in years!
Hubby: Me neither.
Me: Doesn't it make me sound all old to say my podiatrist? Like we're buddies and we have, like, a weekly appointment just to keep my feet all fresh before we head to the all-you-can-eat buffet?
Me: I wonder if Carnies go to the podiatrist.
|Yep. It's safe to say we're pretty weird.|
What kind of Real Bedtime Conversations have happened recently in YOUR house?