...is this thing on...?

Hi.

Yeah, I'm not really sure where to begin.

I confess it's been a while. And I wouldn't blame the 3 of you who actually check on this blog to have given up all together. In which case, you aren't reading this anyway, and this post is somewhat pointless.

But, a girl can dream, can't she?

Anyway. As I said, it's been a while. Probably the longest absence from blogging I've taken since I started blogging a year and a half ago. No recipes. No confessions. No local flavor reviews. No giveaways. It's been almost a month since my last post. It feels like forever.

If you read my last post, you'll know that I bought a house about a month ago. Are you starting to see the correlation to my lapse in posting? But, I will admit, a lot more has been going on in my life that has kept me from opening my laptop and letting my fingers dance on the keys.













Have I mentioned that I'm pregnant?

Yep. In the midst of the up and down roller coaster of "we're-buying-the-house-we're-not-buying-the-house-we-are-afraid-to-buy-the-house-let's-not-buy-the-house-oops-we-are-buying-the-house" adventure we went through during mid-May, some obvious (yet not anticipated) signs led me to the inevitable Pregnancy Test. I was certain that it was a fluke, and I was making it all up in my head. But, behold, on Mother's Day, there were immediately 2 pink lines. The stoic YES YOU ARE PREGNANT. AGAIN. SORT OF BY ACCIDENT. AGAIN.

I was a bit beside myself.

Pregnancies are always a joy, as are the children that are yielded from said pregnancies. But let's be honest: pregnancies can also be scary, especially when you aren't quite expecting them. And you are buying a house. That you are sort of not ready to buy. And you are moving to a new town. And you have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA HOW TO HANDLE TWO KIDS AT ONCE.

Needless to say, I haven't been quite up to the task of blogging. During Little Chica's naps, I've been EXHAUSTED. More so than the first pregnancy. And just like the first time around, I've been nauseous non-stop all day long. Even now, almost 15 weeks later (I know, I took my good old time sharing this news with you. I'm sorry. You deserve better. Can you forgive me?). I'm hoping for some symptom relief soon, but I got very little relief at all during Little Chica's incubation.

But the end result is worth it.

So, not only am I a new homeowner and newly pregnant, I am also in a new town. And I wasn't initially adjusting well.

I am truly a Hometown Girl. And I thought I could be adventurous and brave and try this new town out. But it's been harder than I thought. At first, I reallllllly missed home. I know, it's only 30 minutes away. But it's not convenient. And my family, friends, and everything familiar is there. Like a small child, I stomped my feet and whined. I don't waaaaant to be in a new town. I don't waaaaaaant to get used to a new grocery store. I don't waaaaant to be so far away from the people I love. I don't waaaaaaaant to learn to love this new house. I won't I won't I won't.

What a baby.

I might not have stomped my feet, but I have cried a few times. I have resented my house and my move a few times. I have felt depressed a few times. But it's getting better. Buying a house is a big change. And in my life, that change is multiplied by moving to a new town and finding out that we'll have 2 kids to wrangle instead of 1. For someone who isn't great with change, that's a lot of change.

I need some time to adjust.

And I think that's ok.

Every day gets a bit better. I am coming to terms with being a mom again, being excited despite the fear. I am accepting that this house (this beautiful, blessing of a house) is MY house. My home. And I find comfort in the fact that while I am in a new town now, it isn't forever. One day, a few years from now when we've built some equity, we'll start a home search back in our beloved Hometown. I can be excited by this down-the-road dream of Hubby being within walking distance of the school he works at, being in the same town as our families and friends, and our kids growing up where we grew up.

In the meantime, we have a great adventure to embark on, and that's worth enjoying.

***

I have wanted to write a post a thousand times. But I wasn't ready. I wasn't yet coming to terms with all the feelings I was feeling and the obstacles I was overcoming. And I knew that I couldn't just jump back into regular posts, because that wouldn't be what is actually happening in my heart and in my life. This is the post I needed to write.

So here I am. Building back up to regular posting again. I can't guarantee that I'll be posting recipes in the near future. There are a lot of things still bouncing around in my mind that I want to flesh out on this blog. I hope you come along for the ride. Because your thoughts and advice will be much appreciated.

Thanks for hanging in there. Even more, thanks for your support and walking through life with me, via this here blog.

More to come...